Tell me the kind of family you have and I will tell you the kind of society you have ~ Frederic Le Play
The Modern Family series starts this weekend. We’re looking at the relationships in the home and the attitudes and behaviors that make them work. Our text Sunday is Colossians 3:18-21.
There are several critical interpretative assumptions I make about these four verses. (1) Paul’s audience and reference is to Christian households. (2) We assume both husband and wife are Christ followers. (3) The most important relationship in the family is the relationship between the husband and wife. Paul mentions this relationship prior to that of parenting. (4) Everyone in the household bears some degree of responsibility for the health of a home. Each contributes as a part of their role.
18 Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. 19 Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them. 20 Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord. 21 Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.
There are four verbs worth noting here. Paul speaks of submit, love, obey and encourage (instead of do not provoke). Often each verb is interpreted as peculiar to a specific family role such as wife, husband, child or parent. I believe this interpretation is too limiting. It’s just not one role who submits, obey, loves or encourages, but these attitudes are demonstrated by all within the family unit.
To submit means to practice humility. Serving is what you do when you love someone. To obey means to take responsibility and persevere in doing what you know to be right – the stuff you’ve been exposed to and instructed about in the framework of a Christian community. Extending grace is how you encourage others.
It’s not just the wife who practices humility, we all do. The husband isn’t the only one who serves, we all do. A child or sibling isn’t the only one to take responsibility and persevere in doing right, that’s something we all do. It’s not just the parent’s role to encourage, but each one plays a part in encouraging and expressing grace to members of the same household.
What makes a home work? It’s humility toward each other, the serving of one another, taking responsibility, practicing perseverance and encouraging the other. These are the traits of healthy relationships.
How are relationships working in your home? Maybe this week you can try practicing humility or serving. Perhaps encouragement is in order. Let’s make home work.
